Happy 5th Birthday Apollo!

A thick musk of unfamiliar smells hung in the air as we entered the overstocked little store. The isle ways were narrow, crowded with merchandise, and seemingly cluttered. There was hardly enough room to pass another person in the isle with out being pressed against the shelves and brushing shoulder with the person as they passed. Boxes of fresh, exotic produce were placed hap-hazardly on any available spot on the floor, leaving just a foot path in between them. Spices and incense sweetened the air as I walked down one of the isles, but then the air soured with hints of moth balls, dried fish, and an earthy must from the likes of mushrooms and dried roots. An older asian lady tended the register and greeted customers as they entered the store, "Come in, come in".  Her asian accent was thick and her english broken. Her face was weathered, and aged. Her wrinkles were deep and told the story of a life of hard work. This was the first time we had set foot in this little Thai market. From the moment we stepped inside, it felt as if we were transported to another county.
  Apollo scurried up and down the isles looking at and touching everything that he found remotely interesting. There was candy, treats, snacks and bizarre foods. "Dada...I'm Hungry." he said over and over. Out of all the things that Apollo could have chose in that store to eat, I turned just in time to see him reach out with both hands, grab a large, flat, dark green, leafy vegetable, tear it in half and shove it in his mouth, chew and swallow. "Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum! Delicioso!" he announced licking his lips. I am of course laughing out loud, both out of embarrassment and disbelief. I could feel the expressionless eyes of the asian lady fall upon my back as I positioned myself to block her view of Apollo so she wouldn't know that he just ate some of her produce.

  Apollo really is an anomaly. He loves fruits and vegetables. Not that most kids don't love fruit, but he often prefers vegetables over most other foods. This is the kid that does not like french fries. He will also choose raisin bran cereal over fruit loops when given the choice.
He is not a picky eater either, he just seems to prefer healthy foods over junk foods. He eats stuff right from our garden without prompting or provocation. I have watched him break off pieces of spinach, bok choy, Kale, and Swiss chard right from the plants growing in our garden, for a "little snack" while playing in the yard. Because of this, we deliberately plant grape tomatoes and peas for both the boys to help themselves to as they see fit. When the figs, plums, and persimmons ripen on the trees, Apollo and Orion will pick them from the trees and eat them all day long. I love that we can grow these foods and have them available to the boys to eat as they ripen.

Apollo's love for fruits and vegetables is a testament to the kind of person that he is. He is unique in many ways. He has a love for all things living. I have seen his little heart break when other kids kill a bug or even a snail. He is fascinated by even the tiniest creatures. He likes to know how things work and why. He loves the stars, the sun, the moon, and all things space. He dreams of flying. He has empathy and compassion for all those in his inner circle. He can torment his little brother all day, yet become panicked when Orion is in perceived danger. Apollo loves to be tickled to the point of uncontrollable laughter and then beg for more. He is stubborn, contemplative, insightful, passionate, goal driven, and affectionate. He has a wild imagination. To him, everything in life is an adventure. He is my son and I am proud to be his father. Happy 5th Birthday Apollo!!! You are amazing, and fill my life with joy!

The greatest rewards

 My 45th birthday has come. Just another day I suppose, but I feel fortunate to be alive. Each morning I awake with the feeling that I have been given the greatest gift that a man can be given; my family. I can honestly say that I enjoy spending every minute of spare time with them. Apollo and Orion are my world. I dislike the hours that I have to spend away from them each day as I go to work, and I anxiously hurry home to see them when my day is done.

 Friday night comes, and I want to hang out with my boys. I know Melanie is burned out with kids by this point in the week and can use a night of just adult conversation, and although we fit those nights in, I am just as happy if we take the boys out with us. This is what I signed up for. My only regret as a parent thus far, is that I do not have more time to spend with Apollo and Orion. That statement can make it sound as if I work 60 hours a week, but that is not the case, I work 40 to 45 on average, but I feel as that is time I miss out on spending with my boys. In contrast to Melanie, by Friday evening I am done dealing with the adult populous, and look forward time with my boys to keep it real.

  On a typical weekend morning, I am almost always up by 7:00 am...usually much earlier. The morning plays out one of two ways. I usually awake, slide out of bed, grab my lap top and slip out of the room undetected, letting Melanie and the babies sleep. By 6:30 am, I usually hear little feet hurrying down the hall. It is Orion, carrying a fresh diaper, which he offers to me in order to change him. Although Melanie would have you believe that he got the diaper on his own, the truth is that she opens the bedroom door, hands him the diaper and says, "Go take this to dada,"closes the door behind her and goes back to bed. Don't get me wrong, Melanie is a morning person too, but she just thinks that mornings shouldn't start until after 10:00 am. I will start breakfast for Orion, and Apollo usually shows up about 20 minutes later.
  The second way that my weekend morning could go, is that I will wake up, but stay in bed pretending to sleep. Orion begins to stir and will eventually sit up. I will keep my eyes closed and continue to act as if I am asleep. In a moment, I will get a smack of a small hand on my head followed by a pause. Still, I act as if I am asleep. Next, I will get a small hand on one cheek, another small hand on the other cheek, and then my head will be turned right towards Orion. In a soft whispering voice, I hear "Da". ('Da', is Orion's nickname for me.) After a brief pause, I feel Orion pull his face closer mine, "Da!" his whisper is a little more urgent now. Unable to keep up my game any longer, I will open my eyes and smile. I am greeted with a big smile, a kiss, and a hug. Together we sneak out of the room before being verbally accosted for waking up her Majesty the Slumber Queen.
                                                                               ~
  Apollo is a pretty cautious kid. He is leery of strangers and new situations. Not to the point of being afraid to try something new, he just needs time to process the pros and cons, and then requires some encouragement to work through his apprehensions. I think he has a better understanding of consequence than most young kids. He always has. However, once he overcomes his initial hesitations, he embraces the new situation with open arms. Once he understands the risks, and can navigate around them, then he enjoys getting his adrenaline fix.
  His newest challenge this month was learning to ride his bike on his own. Keep in mind that he has had a "Boot Scoot" (peddle-less bicycle) since he was 3-years-old. This is a great bike to teach balance and control. He has been racing around on that bike for almost the whole time that he has had it. Last summer, we got a "Tag-a-long" bike that connects to my bike. It has peddles on it, but I am the one that provides the balance and control. We also have another small bike for him that has peddles on them that I removed for him to be able to scoot round more easily on. When presented with the opportunity to put his peddles back on and to learn to ride his bike, he has defiantly declined the invitation.
  Since Apollo will turn 5 this month, I presented him with a challenge (aka, a bribe) using his greatest motivator; offering to buy him a new toy that he wanted. The price; learning to ride his bike on his own in 5 days. The deal was that he had to start on his own, ride across the patio, and stop on his own, 5 times in a row. I put his peddles back on his bike on a Monday evening and he had until Saturday morning. Keep in mind that he all the skills already, he just lacked the confidence. Monday evening, I taught him the basics. He could peddle on his own, but did not want to start on his own and wanted me to run along with him and help him stop. There was ample melt downs and renegotiation. He wanted the toy bad, but was mad when I would let go of him, even though my hands were an inch away from his arms and I was trotting along with him.

  I set Apollo up for success. I gave him all the tools he needed to start and stop his bike on his own, but he still needed time to process, and he likes to practice when no one else is looking. Tuesday evening, we started again, this time the results were much better. I could get him started, let him go and he would ride across the yard and stop on his own, He was so proud of himself (as was I). More attempts were made at renegotiating the deal. I held my ground. All he had to do was start his bike on his own, but he was unwilling to try, at least while I was watching.
  Wednesday evening; complete success. He was starting, riding and stopping on his own. "Now can we go get my toy?" He asked in a, 'I held up my end of the bargain' kind of way.

   One trait of Apollo's that I feel will serve him well in life, is his ability to put his fears aside in order to achieve a goal. He becomes very focused and determined.
  As for Orion, he will probably be riding a bike when he is 3. They have completely different approaches to things. I refer to Orion as a pissed off 5-year-old. He doesn't know he is only 20-months-old and is really irritated that he is so short compared to his brother. His size does not hold him back though and he will try to do anything his brother can.
 
  It is a task finding a balance between both personalities. Apollo and Orion are so different in many ways. I love their uniqueness from one another and as individuals. I welcome the challenge of finding what works and what does not for each boy in hopes of giving them  both the tools they need in life to succeed. To this end, I have found that is more about being a super hero to my kids. I get to see their faces light up when something "clicks". I get to challenge them and show them that they can do something that moments before was un achievable.
  But for all that I might have to offer them, it is I that reaps the greatest rewards.
 
 
 
  

Force of nature

Orion is a force of nature. He runs our household...literally! I am not talking about dancing around your average, run-of-the-mill terrible two's tantrum fit. This kid is involved and in charge of everything that goes on in our house. He sees and hears everything and puts himself in the middle of it and barks orders at everyone. In his mind he is helping to cook, vacuum, mop, doing dishes, choosing what we watch on t.v.    Anything that you do, he wants to be involved in and then run things his way. As if this is bad enough, we can't put anything away while he is watching, or he will get it out. It doesn't matter how high we put it either; he will just move furniture around and climb his way up to where he wants to go.
As concerned parents, Melanie and I are constantly on the look out for sharp objects and knifes that are left out, closing doors, latching cupboards, and picking up anything fragile. Since the teenagers in our household have the memory span just shy of that of a goldfish, it is a real task and real concern. Never have I seen, at least in my limited time around children, a kid that gets into that much stuff on a constant basis. Orion goes non-stop from the time he wakes up until his mid day nap, then again from the time he wakes from his nap until about 11:00 pm or so. We try to get him in bed by 8:00pm and have to have all the lights off. He will play in the dark, sing, talk, yell out, try to climb off the bed repeatedly, cry, laugh, slap, pinch, thrash, toss and turn, and head butt, for hours before finally deciding to go to sleep. Then he is awake before 7:00 am and starts the process all over again...it is absolutely tiring.

As I try to write at night after the kids are asleep, I have hardly had a chance of late to do any writing. I am usually asleep before Orion goes down, or I am not that far behind him if he goes first.
  To counter his mayhem, Orion can be the sweetest, most cuddly, fun, and full of laughter kid you can hope for. His smile disarms even the most hostile reaction. His laughter is genuine and everything he does is absolutely adorable.
  Orion is quite the chatterbox now. He knows so many words and small phrases. Many things that he says are still not super clear, but we understand what he is saying most of the time. He also uses hand gestures to get his point across, i.e. patting his hand to his chest while saying "mine".
As yiayia and papa spent a couple weeks with us in March, Orion had the chance to really turn on the charm. Papa has been pretty sick this past year and as a result he is always cold. Orion, always found blankets for papa and would bring them to him and lay them across his lap and say "nigh-nigh". He would also get papa's cane for him whenever he got up and needed to walk. Orion would chase him around the house with the cane yelling "Papa! Papa!"

Comets and Constellations

The sun drops below the hills across the valley bringing the day to a close. A thin layer of dark grey and purple broken clouds streach across the sky partially concealing the last colors of day. Lights begin to flicker on and grow brighter in the distance silhouetting trees and buildings in the dusk.

A wave of cool air ushers its way from the ocean, over the hills and across the valley floor pushing out the warmth that the sun left in its wake. This could have been any one of four evenings in the middle of march that Apollo and I spent together looking for the Panstarrs comet. The moist air and thin clouds prevented us from seeing the comet with our naked eyes, however, we were able to capture it on my camera with long exposures.

Ultimately, it was the quality one-on-one time that I was able to spend with Apollo. We talked about the comet, the stars, sun, moon, planets, and rockets. We talked about Orion, and yiayia and papa (who were visiting at the time) and numerous other things. I enjoy these moments immensely. I learn so much from him during these times and can really appreciate who he is becoming. On our second evening outing, a car pulled up on the all but now deserted stretch of road in front of the regional park by our house. Out hopped a mother and father and their 8-year-old son, whom rushed over to say "hi" to Apollo and I, and introduce himself. The boys mother made small talk for a moment and was happy to learn that we were out looking for the comet as well.  Upon looking up in the sky, the mother pointed to some stars.
 "See those three stars in a row? Thats Orion's belt!" she said enthusiastically.
"It's part of the constellation Orion," replied Apollo, "and my baby brother is named Orion."
"Wow! That's impressive! How did you know that?" said the mother.
"My dad told me." Apollo answered.
"And you have a brother named Ryan?" the mother asked.
"No! His name is O-rion, like the constellation!"Apollo snapped back.
"Mommy, whats a con-sell...a-shun?" whispered the confused 8-year-old.
At this point I could no longer contain my laughter, albeit bad timing.
"Well, with a brother named Orion, what is your name?" came the mothers voice, while ignoring my laughter and her sons question.
"Apollo." he replied.
"Apollo? What a cool name! So you were named after the stars too!" she said excitedly.
"Actually, I was named after the sun, because Apollo is the sun god," came Apollo's reply.
At this point I started laughing again and then apologized to the mother. I explained that I was laughing because I was surprised that Apollo was talking to her because he is usually painfully shy to strangers. I also explained that I was both proud of him listening to what I and been telling him and at the same time embarrassed that he sounded like a know it all.
  Not sounding convinced, the boys mother turned to her son then pointing to the the brightest star in the sky. "See that star? Its actually a planet and I bet it's Venus."
"Actually, thats Jupiter," Apollo clarified.

Our new friends left shortly after this
  We invited them to join us the next night as it promised to better night to see the comet, however, they were a "no show"... Can you blame them?