Sometimes you gotta say Phuket

Thailand. I have started this post at least a dozen times in the past eight months. I needed some distance to sort out my thoughts and feelings about Thailand and now need to finish before the new year begins. While I can say we loved Thailand, or at least Phuket, I was a bit discouraged by all the trash. I can't fault Thailand as much as I fault people and consumerism (all around the world) in general. We are no better here in the USA, we just have infrastructure in place to deal with it better. I guess in some ways, that makes us worse. I have had to stop several times while writing this post as I did not want it to end up being a rant on environmental issues. I could not separate it out completely because I still feel I need to say something about it, as it did impact our trip. Trust me when I say that this is the condensed version of my original rantings on the subject.

 The Thailand I had hoped for and the Thailand I experienced, were as different as any American reality show is from real life in the US. I cant say that I was disappointed, but if I could do it over again with the knowledge that I have now, I would have taken a different approach. That said, I am in no hurry to return to Thailand. Not because I didn't enjoy our trip there, but it was hard to enjoy myself completely, when nearly everywhere was so littered with trash. I don't mean this to sound judgmental, it just makes me sad to see the country's beauty marred by litter, especially when it affects the wildlife and there are many other places that I would like to visit before returning.



  We pack a lot into a short amount of time on our trips to experience as much as we can in the time that we have.
My feelings on Thailand are a bit mixed. The people are kind, the food is amazing, the culture is interesting, and some of the sights are stunning. On the opposite side of the spectrum; excessive trash, over crowding of tourist sites, over commercialization of tours and sites, plastic, and did I say excessive trash? We saw such a small portion Thailand on our week that we spent in Phuket and I am sure that once you leave the tourist areas, it is quite a lovely country, but the amount of trash that littered the ground, the flora and fauna, and sadly, even the ocean, was really disheartening. I guess I had higher expectations for Thailand.

And then there is the domestication of animals, mostly elephants, but also tigers.





It is easy for us as Americans to condemn the Thai people for using elephants for shows to make a profit. It wasn't long ago in this country that circuses had elephants as part of their shows. That ended only a few years ago here. As a kid and young adult, I remember the ring masters smacking the legs and back of the elephants or snapping a whip behind them and lions, to get them to move or respond in the desired manner. In Phuket, we did not observe any physical abuse of the elephants, however, it begs the question, how are they so well trained.








We visited the Phuket FantaSea show on our last night in Phuket. It was not on our original wish list but we were given two free passes, so we decided to go and see what all the hype was about. The show was well done, but again, I have some ethical questions about the training of the animals.

Knowing what we know now, we would have skipped this show and especially the riding of the elephants. They are beautiful, majestic creatures and it breaks my heart to think this may stress them out in any way. Still, the boys will not soon forget the experience.

 I know that I can no more expect to go to a Native American reservation and see people living in tepee's, hunting buffalo with bows, and living off the land, than I could expect to see native Thai people living in grass huts, fishing with spears, and climbing trees to pick coconuts. However, I had hoped to experience a simpler culture.

I realize that much of the areas that we visited, exists solely for tourism, and because of that, you find all the things that come with a thriving metropolis, without the sustainability and oversight of an infrastructure that can support it. For my taste, I like the small villages in any culture and would have liked to experience that in some form in Thailand.


I know this would have required more research and planning and my part, plus time, and several extra vaccines. I would have liked to find locals to take us on a boat to the places the tour boats don't go. I would have liked to find a rain forest to hike through, and a deserted beach, unspoiled by visitors.


  Food and culture are deeply intertwined in Thailand, and we did get to experience a small amount if it. Yes, the food was outstanding and that alone would be enough for many people who visit Thailand.  If Apollo and Orion were a little older, I think some small huts in a rainforest near a snorkel friendly beach would have been the perfect Thailand vacation. All four us love exploring and hunting for bugs, fish and birds.

  I cannot say enough good things about the Marriott Phuket Beach Club where we stayed during our trip. The facilities and grounds were pristine. The employees and Thai people are friendly and always offer a warm smile.






There were great restaurants, a gym with a spa, stores, kids clubs, multiple swimming pools, beach massage facilities (which we took advantage of daily), and our villa was beautiful.










If our intent was to stay in one place to soak up some Thai sun while being pampered, this place certainly fit the bill perfectly. But, we came to experience Thailand, so this served as our home base with daily trips away from this small piece of paradise.

We rented a car in Thailand. Driving in Phuket is an experience in itself. So many vehicles...especially motorcycles, often with 3 or 4 passengers, all going in different directions with an anarchist approach to traffic laws. The car did offer us the freedom to come and go as we pleased and on our own schedule. After a few days, I started to feel a bit more comfortable navigating the city.

  Jumping right in to our trip, we found our way to Monkey hill on the first day and took a long hike up the hill to meet the monkeys.

We were cautious but we did purchase bananas and peanuts to feed the monkeys, ironically from a vendor/home right in front of a sign telling you not to feed the aggressive animals.

We spent an hour interacting with these beautiful creatures and by the end of the trip, both boys admitted that this was one of their favorite part of the trip.

We laughed, we were fascinated, we were intrigued, and we laughed some more. I think we could have gone here daily and not been bored. The boys were disappointed that we did not find our way back to Monkey hill before we left.

 For one of our guided adventures, we took a day "snorkeling" trip to the PhiPhi islands... which turned out to be nothing more than a tourist boat excursion, on a tight schedule, that just happened to stop at a couple places (for a short time) where you could snorkel if you wanted. (Man, I missed Fiji with my brother and his family this day.)








The water was beautiful but the sites were too touristy for my taste, and every spot was overly crowded with boats and people all jockeying for a spot. Did I mention that this was the shoulder season, weeks removed from the peak of tourism? I couldn't imagine being here in December.





As we always do, we made the best of the situation and really enjoyed ourselves.

Night markets in Thailand are a
whole different adventure in themselves. While the biggest ones (and tourist oriented) take place on the weekend nights, we found some during the week that were quite impressive.



















The markets were packed with natives and very few tourists. The food booths were a thing of beauty. There were so many different types of food all ornately displayed. There were even vendors dedicated to the culinary delicacy of insects.





Grubs, worms, crickets, ants, and water beetles were relished by the locals. The grubs unexpectedly tasted a bit like bacon. Melanie was the bravest of us all and ate more than Apollo and I combined. Orion wasn't having any of it.

We could have tried ten different foods every night in Thailand at one of these markets and we still would not have made a dent in the variety of options that they had to offer.

The boys really enjoyed shopping in the night market and we all had some good laughs at the knock -offs of name brand merchandise.

 Apollo and Orion found some bags and souvenirs, did some haggling, and got to experience something very different than what they are used to back home in the states.  The prices for items at the night markets were very reasonable since they were geared towards the locals and hot the tourists. Denim jeans started at about $3, while used shoes seemed to be a hot item especially brand named shoes.





At first, the night markets seemed like such an oddity. But once you realize that the days are hot and humid, it make sense that the markets take place at night, out of the heat of the sun. The markets are a place for friends to meet, do some shopping, and families to have dinner. I was surprised by how many people were there. It seemed more like a fair than a market with the amount of people in attendance. The people watching was great, but we stood out like a sore thumb and the locals were watching us as much as we watched them.

On our last day in Phuket, we went searching for a little lesser known beach off the beaten path.

It was marked by a small sign that could be easily missed if I hadn't been better prepared.  The hike to the beach was through a beautiful jungle and we had to kind of guess at which way to go.

Sadly, this beautiful beach, Banana Beach, was overrun with trash. I know that my pictures do not reflect what I am describing, as I made a conscious effort to avoid taking pictures showing the trash. In hindsight, I would have taken a lot of pictures to document this but at the time, I wanted to focus on the positive as much as possible.

While not may tourist were at this beach with us, most all of them were walking the beach picking up trash or pulling trash from the water.

Melanie, Apollo, and I all snorkeled at this beach, and you could hardly swim a body length without running into plastic bags, cups, styrofoam, and other pieces of trash floating in the water.

The bags often contained trapped fish. While very sad, it was also a great learning experience for all of us... especially the boys. They were able to see first hand the effects of single use plastic bags on such a delicate environment.

Still, we had a blast at this beach in between pulling trash from the water.

















Thailand exceeded my expectations in the food department. First and foremost, the fruit was AMAZING!!

Both price and variety. Apollo could live on dragon fruit alone, while Melanie and I couldn't get enough of the passion fruit.

Orion's addiction was pineapple and bananas which never taste quite as sweet on the mainland as they do in the tropics.

Through in some papaya, mangos, and fresh coconut milk, and we were all pretty happy.





















That said, our favorite restaurant that we found was a literally a tarpaulin and bamboo shack. It was situated in the trees off the beach, and in between resorts on a little traveled set of roads used more by residents than tourists.

We found this spot quite by accident while ridding loaner bikes from the resort. We initially thought it was a shanty town of homes the first time we went by. 

When we circled back to the resort, we noticed a sign and menu out front. We came back that same day to sample the fairs after seeing the live seafood bins out front. We had some of the best seafood here. The food was so fresh and so good that we came back the following day. The prices were very reasonable and the food was unbelievably delicious.





We also ate at a fancy restaurant at the resort and while the food was unreal tasting, and the presentation was impeccable, the price was what you would expect to pay at a fancy restaurant in the San Francisco Bay Area.

What was most noteworthy about this trip in regards to Apollo and Orion, was their comfort level in the water. Both boys had been on swim team for about nine months when we went to Thailand. Because of this, they were not afraid to venture out in the ocean with snorkeling gear on. It made it a bit nerve racking for Melanie and I as we had to chase after them and bring them closer in. Even when the sea was a little rough, the didn't hesitate to get in the water. Apollo even navigated a plethora of jellyfish at Banana beach only managing to get stung a couple times.

The boys are becoming more aware of the differences in cultures and learning to respect those differences.  They are concerned for the the wildlife and environment wherever we go and I love seeing them pick up trash when they see it on the ground. Apollo now chooses to not use straws when offered to him with a drink. We want the boys to embrace the world, love to travel, love people, and not be afraid to try new things. With that, I think we are doing a fairly good job.

In summary, I would say to anyone that has ever considered traveling to Thailand; Go!! Do not be discouraged by what I pointed out in regards to trash and litter. Just know what to expect. Get your travel vaccines, eat from the street vendors, visit the night markets, and try the grubs.

And then there were two: Meet Ace and Zohra

"This is the first time in my entire life that I have not had a dog." ~ Melanie

  Remi has been an only dog for seven years, since Lucy passed away in February 2012. We have talked about getting another dog off and on over the years, but I for one, enjoyed only having one dog. It made it easier to bring him along camping, or to find a pet sitter for, or to take for a ride to the store. One is easy. The down side to this is that Remi would be home alone during the days, and when we left for an overnighter, he was home alone again.

  Melanie and I have had conversations about this for years now. Until recently, Remi could handle a night at home by himself, but he seemed to have a little separation anxiety happening more recently, judging from the neighbors reports of him barking all night, not his normal "there is a cat in the yard bark" but his mournful, "I'm all alone" bark. It got us thinking about getting him dog to keep him company and debated whether or not he would like sharing his home with another dog. Needless to say, Remi passed away last month, within a few days of us returning from our most recent trip and a few days before we departed for another. While we are still mourning his loss, Melanie and I both agree that it was better that he passed while we were home and not while we were away. Two weeks later and I am still checking to see if he is laying at my feet when I awake at night.

  After Remi passed. Melanie kept reiterating the fact that it was indeed the first time in her life that she was without at least one dog. She also made it very clear that she was going to be the one that would pick out our next dog. Initially, I wanted to take some time off from having another dog to contend with, but Melanie made a very valid argument about the fact that I am traveling a lot and she would be more comfortable with a dog here to warn off would be trespassers. Melanie also made the point that the kind of dog she would want if she had her choice ( and considering that I was adamant about hair dogs vs fur dogs ~ think allergies) was a Maltipoo or a... honestly I can't remember what the other one was because a Maltipoo is my kind of dog and that's all I needed to hear. 😃
So began the search.

       Initially I thought about waiting until Melanies birthday in October to find a Maltipoo. but then I started to realize that we are headed into fall, and then winter. It would be so much easier to potty train a dog this time of year than during our rainy season. Also realizing that Melanie was headed on a road trip in a few days, I thought it would be a great bonding time for a new dog and allow her to work on potty training. Note: I did do my due diligence and checked shelters and rescues for Matlipoo's and similar breeds and was unable to find a dog within our region that would work with our family dynamics. (Skittish. Does not like children. Needs to be in a single pet home. etc.)

 




I then began to look at ads for Maltipoo's and after a few phone calls and email conversations, I discovered how many shady and dishonest people are out there. While I desperately tried to find a white, beige, or white and beige Maltipoo to add a new color pallet to our four-legged family, the unsavory people eliminated those choices for me. I kept coming back to an add in a dog publication for some black and white Maltipoo puppies. I finally shared the ad with Melanie and she was in love. I reached out to the owner and found him to be the first normal person that I had dealt with in my puppy search. He was located in San Jose and I just happened to be passing through the following day. We agreed to meet and I let Melanie know what time so she could answer my FaceTime call and pick a puppy...What a horribly bad idea that was. All that I can recall from that meeting was, "I can't decide," "If you love me, you'll get both for me," "They will keep each other company," and then driving away in a stupor with two puppies, and me being the only one of the 3 people involved in the transaction that didn't leave there completely satisfied. Now I remember why I didn't let Melanie be involved with the selection of the last puppy. 😉

  Meet Ace and Zohra. Orion picked the name Ace for the boy and Apollo picked Zohra for the girl. Yes, we are crazy for getting two puppies, and Yes, they are the cutest dogs ever, and NO, You can't have one, so quit asking!! 😂

 I think Remi would approve of these two little rascals but I also believe that he is happy to not have to share his home with them.

Welcome to the Zoo Ace and Zohra!

Remi

Why...?
How...?
What if I...?
If I only...?

So many questions, so much guilt. So unexpected...

 Remi passed away last night, August 17th, around 10:00pm. He did not come when called at bed time. Melanie and I went outside to look for him and found him lying still as if he simply fell asleep. Our hearts are broken.

  May 25th, 2009 is the day that Remi came into our lives. He was about 8 weeks old when Apollo and I "stumbled" across the little fur ball.

Melanie was gone on a girls, Memorial Day weekend trip to the Oregon coast, which doubled as a weening weekend for 1-year-old Apollo. I found an ad for a litter of puppies that were a cross between a Miki and a Japanese Chin.

Always a fan of small "hair" dogs, Apollo and I had to take a look. Apollo, grabbed Remi as soon as he met him and said, "Mine." We brought him home and waited for Melanie to return. We let Melanie name him. She chose Remi; a shortened version of Remington, although I always joked it was short for Remedial.

Remi was the ideal family dog, though it took more than six years for him to realize that he wasn't the Alpha of the family.

He never showed aggression towards another dog, animal, or person, and wanted nothing more than to be the center of attention. His only perceived rival was Orion and it took until a year ago to realize that Orion was just another member of the pack.

I referred to Remi as the boys "fur brother", and they as Remi's "skin brothers."

  Remi loved camping. If we opened the RV door for anything, while parked in our yard, Remi would jump inside and lie down in "his" chair, just to make sure we didn't forget to take him along.



He loved the beach and the water and would run in-and-out of the waves on his own accord and then splash in the water along side the boys.



  When we brought home Shredded, he became Remi's cat and not ours. He welcomed every dog into our home and always had impeccable doggie manners.

Remi climbed in bed with Apollo every night at bed time, and then waited until Melanie and I went to bed. He would then sleep at my feet all night, leaping from the bed and racing out the dog door at the slightest hint of something being amiss.








He chased off raccoons, possum, fox, mice, snakes, cats, and skunks...that is until he finally got sprayed twice this summer. In his mind he felt betrayed; he only wanted to play with the like colored funny looking dog.










At 10 1/2 years old, he still had a lot of puppy in him. Remi was energetic and playful, even on the day that he passed.
Melanie and I have been playing back the days and weeks leading up to his passing. Its the natural thing to do I guess, struggling with guilt. Did we overlook something? Was he sick and we missed the signs? If we looked for him sooner, could we have saved him?
Remi had a great life with us, but it was far shorter than we would have liked.  Our home feels empty and our hearts are heavy.

  Remi was our pet, our companion, our protector, and our friend.

Run free little buddy. We love you. We miss you and always will. You took a huge chunk of our hearts with you when you left.

Remington - March 25, 2009 ~August 17, 2019

Orion turns 8

Has it really been eight years? Two thoughts on this; It seems much longer than eight years, but then again, eight years seems to have passed by in the blink of an eye.





 Orion is our enthusiastic kid. His excitement and anticipation for all things fun, is only matched by his heartfelt disappointment when things do not go according to his plan. This kid has my heart. He is adventurous, energetic, bright, thrives off of interacting with others, and wants to be in the middle of everything.




 Seven brought on the loss of no less than 4 teeth; mostly his front teeth. Orion managed to swallow one tooth while eating an apple but the tooth fairy still left him ten bucks.
 


With weekly swim team practice, Orion swims like a fish. His confidence in the water has grown tenfold this year. He will tell you that he hates swim team but the skills he is gaining are invaluable and truth be told, his mom and I love to watch him swim.







 Orion has been doing flips into the pool since he was three-years-old. Now that he has access to a diving board, he does front flips like a champ!

  Every year with Orion is my new favorite age. I am looking forward to 8 and eagerly anticipate every moment we spend together.


Never change. Always be yourself and proud of who you are. Be confident, be bold. be strong.

I love you with my entire heart.

Happy Eighth Birthday Orion!

Apollo turns 11

He may not have received his Hogwarts letter, but he is plenty magical when it comes animals. His patience and understanding of them, draws animals to him. He is endlessly entertained by creatures and never tires of them or their antics. He is Newt Skamander, Radagast the Brown, or Saint Francis; take your pick. His favorite part of any trip to anywhere in the world, will undoubtedly be some interaction with an animal. The world can use more wizards like him.
  Apollo turns eleven today and as I reflect on his life this far, I feel an immense amount of satisfaction and pride. As his father, I see his potential. I know what he is capable of becoming. I also know his weaknesses and what his struggles are. As with any parent, I want the best for this son of mine and want him to be successful and happy when he becomes a man.

  At 11, Apollo stands about 5' tall. He lingers in the 90th percentile for height for his age. He loves tennis, cycling, and enjoys swimming. He is an avid reader and always has a book in his hands. Currently, he is reading the Harry Potter series.
 Apollo has a quick wit, great sense of humor, and an over developed sense of sarcasm. One of my greatest pleasures in life is when Apollo decides to wake his mom up in the morning before she wants to be up. With a very exaggerated tone of bliss and contempt in his made up, high pitched voice, he will pet her head and her arm while saying things like, "Oooooh! What happened? Did the morning come too soon? Are you sleepy? Time to get uuuup!" And when Melanie protests, it just adds fuel to the fire, "Ooooooooh! Did you get angry? Get up mama! Time to get up?"

  I can honestly say that Apollo is a happy kid. I see it on his face when I pick him up from school. I see it in his eyes, and hear it in his voice. And then there is that smile. Not the cheesy smile that he uses whenever we try to take a picture of him, but the genuine smile that can light up the most dismal room. 
 Eleven is gateway age. The journey through puberty, testosterone, and attitude is at our doorstep and I am nervous about navigating the next phase of his life. But for now, I am content with this gregarious animal loving boy of mine.



Happiest of Birthdays Apollo!!!

~I love you~

51

If I'm being honest, he's been there my entire life; hiding in the shadows...in the corners...in my dreams. In my youth, he had no form beyond the darkness  and the random sounds in the night. I learned to ignore him in my post-pubescent, testosterone driven, invincibility years, but I know he was still there lurking in the shadows. While I ignored him, I feared him most in those years, feeding him all the energy that he needed to start to take shape. I was in my early 20's when I first saw him clearly. He saw fit to show me that I was indeed mortal, reaching his long tendril like hands around my chest and squeezing the very air from my lungs, watching the terror in my eyes as the world faded to black.
 At some point I made my peace with him and began to fear him less as the years passed. Still, he was there. Always watching, always following close behind. I often saw him out of the corner of my eye, following me out of the plane in my skydiving years. I think he loved skydiving as much as I did. I always imagined him smiling as the ground rushed up to meet us.
Now, I see him when I look over my shoulder checking for cars in the road, when i'm on my bike. He's on a bike of his own, black robes billowing in the wind behind him, peddling hard to keep up. I admittedly will peddle harder at times to make sure he doesn't get any closer. He's always there with the first glance but gone when I look again, yet I know he is still there; following, waiting, biding his time.
  Macabre as it may sound to speak of death in such a manner, I don't see his presence as a dark omen. Just a simple reminder of my mortality and how short and precious and delicate this life is. I've made it more than half a century on this earth and I hope to find several more decades before my time is up. While I may not fear death himself, I am not ready to submit to his final voyage either. I want to continue to walk my young boys into adulthood, watch their successes, help them get up after their failures, watch them become men and start families of their own. I want to explore more of this world and see as much of her beauty as I can and hopefully do it with Melanie by my side, while I still have the strength within my bones to do so.
  My mantra in my youth was once, "You only live once!" In my older years, it has changed to, "You only die once, but you live every day."
 I am grateful for another year. Too many friends have not been so lucky to make it this far. Every year, a couple more friends take that final journey. Some never saw it coming, others knew and fought the good fight to the end, and then there are those who succumbed to a period of immense sorrow and loneliness and chose to end their suffering on their own. For some, their time ended in throws of doing what they loved...I count them as the fortunate ones. For all of them, I grieve and because of them I choose to live everyday. While time and money may limit my ability to travel and explore the world on a daily basis, I still look for and find something every day that reminds me how beautiful this life is.  God willing, I will never feel the touch of the grim reapers cold grip upon my heart or ravaging tendrils eating my body from the inside, or stealing my memories and my dignity over time. I hope to see him following behind for many years. When alas, plagued by old age, my body says, "enough is enough." I will then greet my old friend Mr Reaper and let him take me to a tropical paradise where I will patiently await the ones left behind to live their own long and fulfilling lives.