Say Something

It's snack time. 

A daily ritual for elementary school aged kids, except this day things were going to be slightly different. Apollo approached his teacher, showed him his origami book and then announced, "This is my origami book. I am going to show the class how to make a giraffe. I need you pass out paper to everyone." 

  Fortunately, Maestro Brooks is adaptable and obliged Apollo, passed out paper, and let him teach the class. 

  There is a story behind this, but before I get to it, Apollo, for those that know him like we do, this is kind of a big deal. We used to think Apollo was shy, and in ways he is sort of shy, but we have come to understand that he is more motivated by what makes him feel comfortable vs uncomfortable. By this I mean, where as most people have the desire to please others or to  have some sort of social reciprocity, Apollo just does not care to talk, interact, or respond to you if he does not feel inclined to. Melanie sums up his not wanting to interact with someone as, "I don't care if you like me, and I don't want to talk to you...Sorry about your luck." He  really seems to care less what others think of him.

 It has been a challenge for us as parents to convince him that when someone talks to him, the polite thing to do is acknowledge them and at the very least, say something!

  Apollo is well into first grade and he is doing great. Many of his fears and concerns that he had about entering the first grade have all but faded from his mind. I am quite impressed by his level of comprehension of the Spanish language already. He breaks out singing Spanish songs at random times, and will throw out Spanish phrases on a whim. He does a fair job of reading and writing Spanish, but I am even more surprised by his desire and ability to read in English. He has not yet had any English lessons and will not until the 3rd grade, but he is eager to pick up a book (written in English) and sound out the words. It is amazing to watch his little brain soak up so much knowledge. We are thankful for the opportunity that he has to attend a Spanish immersion school. 

  During his first parent-teacher conference of the year, his teacher expressed concern that Apollo sometimes seems to let his mind wander. He does not always stay engaged with the class. He has the perfect teacher for this as he recognizes this in Apollo and then will give him gentle promptings, to which Apollo responds well to and then will jump back in. I am thankful with the level of attention that Maestro Brooks gives to our son. He has taken the time to email Melanie and myself to ask about Apollo, looking for ways to engage him better. We have told Maestro Brooks to enjoy the quiet reserved Apollo, because when he comes all the way out of his shell, he will want to put him back. 

  In our conference, Maestro Brooks asked what Apollo's interests were, and we told him that right now he is obsessed with origami. This sparked his interest and he asked if Apollo might like to teach the class how to make an origami animal sometime, as a way to get him to open up a little more in class. He asked us to have him pick something out and practice it, and he would set up some time in a few weeks to have Apollo teach the class how to make the animal that he selected.

  Later that evening, Melanie discussed this with Apollo and asked if he would like to do this sometime. "Yes," he said, not acting totally interested in the idea.

Unbeknownst to us, Apollo took his origami book to school the very next day, and decided that would be the day he was going to teach origami.

Orion is the bigger talker out of the two boys. Let me qualify that by saying, Apollo talked just as much as Orion at this age, and I think Apollo may have had a bigger vocabulary, at least earlier on he did, but as I explained, Apollo my chose to not talk or respond to you at any given moment. Orion, by contrast, is very engaging and will answer and respond to everything. He listens to every conversation in the house and will involve himself in that conversation.

  I cannot tell you how much I enjoy this aspect of Orion. It brings me an immense amount of pleasure to converse with him. The best part is that he has adorable facial expressions and head movements that go long with his talking....                 Upon coming home one evening from work to a house full of kids and every toy that we own strewn out across the floor, I was faced with two choices; freak out that the house was such a mess, or engage the kids who are all excitedly screaming "Dada's home!!" (Yes, even the kids that Melanie watches, call me dada)...                       I chose to play along. "Raise your hand if your naughty!" I announce, raising my hand in the air looking at the five kids running and screaming through the house. As all the other kids laughed and pointed at, and accused each other of being naughty, Orion stops in his tracks, looks at me very sincerely and says "Dada," shaking his head from side to side, "I'm not naughty."

  "You're not?" I ask while trying to hold back my smile.

"Uh-uh," he replies, still shaking his head from side to side, looking even more serious just so I know there is no mistake to-be-made, "I'm not." Truth be told, Orion is correct, he does not have a naughty bone in his body, which is way more than I can say for the other four kids that day, including Apollo.

  Apollo has taught Orion the word "special" and uses it in the context of "this toy is very special to me, so I don't want you to play with it." While tucking Orion into bed one evening, I told him that he was very special to me. "Dada," he says, "Apollo is very special to me." He loves his big brother even though Apollo pesters him constantly. 

Apollo does have his moments though: Upon putting the boys to bed one night, Orion was crying when I left the room, and saying,  "I'm scared!" Suddenly the crying stopped. I walked by the room to peak in to see what was happening. Orion saw me and called out,

 "Dada! Apollo made me happy!" 

Apollo had climbed into bed with his brother and held him until he fell asleep.

  Orion does a great job communicating. He speaks very clearly, knows what he wants to say, and if he does not know the word, he does a great job of describing what he means, explaining it, or even showing you. One thing that he is very verbal about is the fact that he does not like to wear pull-ups at night. He has been potty trained for a long time now, however, he does wet the bed on occasion still, so we put a pull up on him at night. It is a constant battle for me. Instead of fighting with him about it every night, I wait until he falls asleep and then I put a pull-up on him. Every morning he gets mad that he has a "diaper" on. The best part about it, is that he blames Melanie for putting it on him. I, of course, let him believe that his mom did it. The nights that he does pee in his sleep is usually when he has stayed up too late, and/or had chocolate milk before bed. One Friday evening, he stayed up late as Melanie and I were out and Aden was in charge. Orion probably conned Aden into giving him several cups of chocolate milk.   It was after 11pm when Orion finally fell asleep and I was able to put a pull up on him. At 6:00am the next morning (I was already gone from the house) Orion woke up Melanie. "Mama," he began, "I need new clothes!"

"Why?" she asked, (really meaning,"why are you awake already?"). Orion awoke in the middle of the night and had climbed int bed with us. Melanie reached over to him and felt that he (and the bed) were wet.

"I need new clothes," he added, "because I am melting."

 Watching my boys grow, learn and develop their own distinct personalities, has been the highlight of parenting for me. From Apollo's humor, introspection, and even his temper and occasional naughtiness, to Orion's sweetness and desire to communicate by responding to every question, I never find a dull moment with them. While at times I wish they wouldn't talk so much, I am always thankful that they do talk and do it so well, even if it is excessive...and yes, they both even talk in their sleep.